Ill-Advised

I love children's books. Good ones. I like to be snobby about them, and because of this I occasionally get my come-uppance.

For Christmas, my sister bought the kids this version of Rumplestiltskin.

 I remember it from when I was a kid and I love the illustrations. I can still hear the deep voice of my elementary school librarian, Mrs. Moore, a woman whose height and bearing was formidable, reading this to us. This story is, like all true fairy tails, incredibly bizarre and slightly creepy. Why would the miller lie to the king about his daughter's ability to spin straw into gold? Why was the miller's daughter never again asked to spin more straw into gold? Had the prince fallen in love with her enough to not care anymore? And most importantly, as Brad says, "What does it all MEAN???"

I don't know, all I know is that at the end of the book, after the miller's daughter correctly guesses Rumpelstiltskin's name, he gets very angry and screams, "the devil told you that, the devil told you that!" Would you like to guess which line from this story is most often repeated in public with great glee and volume? Yeah. The people at Nordstrom Rack really loved it, I could tell they want us to come back reeeeeeeal soon.

Ok, so, other people buying books for your kids can be a gamble, but one of my choices for Christmas also has me kicking myself.

I bought Dom the above title, plus many others by Steve Jenkins, after we'd happened upon this one at the library:

this book is fantastic, by the way

Included in "What Do You Do If Something Wants to Eat You" is a profile on the basilisk lizard, also known as the Jesus Christ lizard, because it can run on the water. After watching a few videos of this creature in action, the kids are hooked. Multiple times a day I overhear Dominic playing and narrating, "The Jesus Christ lizard is running on the water!!!" and every time it startles me because it sounds like he is constantly taking the Lord's name in vain.

You should buy these books; why miss out on all the fun??? Actually, you should buy them because despite the possibility of embarrassing content, they are good books.


Awkward Update: My sister texted my iPad and refuses to take any responsibility for Rumpelstiltskin. So. I'm not sure who bought it for us, but whoever you are, thank you, we love it. Even with the devil parts. Tell me who you are, and you can get blog-thanked.